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Tweets From 140 Characters or Less – Hamburger Helper

Tweets From 140 Characters or Less – Hamburger Helper

Alright to each her/his own, but I’ve never been a fan of Hamburger Helper. I don’t know who it was who looked at a pile of vomit at a summer cookout and thought “You know what would look good on this? Velveeta” but whoever it was this person is rolling in cash because this shit’s still popular.

So it’s even more comical that a glove with a Twitter account has the social life of people with multiple appendages and extremities. He even dates like us and asked the Twitterverse for help with his online dating profile:

 

hamburger helper okcupid

My advice is to add “you give up at life” to the second one.

He also does other fun, young adult things like the rest of us, like participate in Movember:

hamburger helper movember

Wait don’t you stir the helper? Damn it there’s going to be hair everywhere.
But if you think it will improve the taste…

He also hits up America’s highways for road trips:

I’m going to suggest Carrie Underwood’s “Jesus Take The Wheel” because then at least someone is driving the damn car.

I’m going to suggest Carrie Underwood’s “Jesus Take The Wheel” because then at least someone is driving the damn car.

But judging by the rest of his tweets, it seems like his preference is for late 90s R&B:

hamburger helper stirrin beef
“I got a real painful helper-fueled shit that’s waiting for me-e…”

On a side note: I’m gonna feel like a dinosaur if you don’t know what song he’s referencing.

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