Why I shouldn’t be allowed to travel alone (aka Facebuzzed will be back next week)

Why I shouldn’t be allowed to travel alone (aka Facebuzzed will be back next week)

There won’t be a Facebuzzed this week. Why? Because I just got back from a weeklong business trip to New England for a convention. It left little time to search for social media booze pages.

Usually, when I stay in a hotel for a trip it’s me and three other people trying to cram into a one bedroom to save money. This time I was left to my own devices, which probably was not a good idea as I reveal to you the top four saddest things I did on an away trip:

(1) I sat on the floor of my hotel room and ate an entire rotisserie chicken by myself while watching Monday Night Football.
chicken and football
I’m glad I did self-checkout when I bought it. Otherwise that would have been a fun conversation with the cashier. “Will that be all, ma’am? You sure you don’t want me to ring up some divorce papers and adult children who never call you?”

In that same vein of fatassery, some of the convention events had free food so I also was guilty of (2) grabbing free food from one side of the room, then eating it while standing in a second line for food on the other side. I’m pretty sure this is some sort of social faux pas.

(3) I stopped showering about four days in. Don’t freak out. I’m pretty sure the number of days I showered outnumbered the days I didn’t. Plus I washed the areas that matter (Though given my level of exhaustion I think everyone should be grateful I didn’t roll out of bed in the previous day’s clothing).

Also I will have showered by the time you read this so feel free to hug me next time you see me.

Actually wait, don’t hug me. I just remembered my fourth and final shameful point.

I capped off the convention work week by getting sick. I couldn’t afford to feel like crap and I needed sleep so I bought some generic Nyquil. Problem was, the only sizes it came in far exceeded the 3 oz liquid limit allowed on an airplane. And I wasn’t about to waste all this liquid sleeping gold.

So I went to the 24-hour CVS, (4) bought three airplane sized bottles (which in retrospect cost more than the medicine itself) and then transferred the rest of the medicine.

Screen shot 2013-11-07 at 3.00.29 AM

The following day, upon passing through airport security, I proceeded to chug some of the bottle so I could sleep on the plane. I think it made finding out there was no more room to stow my luggage after boarding much more pleasant to handle.

I’m back home and hopefully making better life decisions from here on out (including writing an actual Facebuzzed and not such a thorough log of my grossness). See you next week.