This week’s tweets are carbo-loaded, but not with Barilla Pasta, whose CEO, named Guido (I can’t make that up) doesn’t want gays to eat his pasta. Also, Breaking Bad concluded, leaving us reaching for the remote as Low Winter Sun starts.
The joke’s on Guido Barilla – as if gay guys went near carbs anyway!
I’m actually eating pasta because I’m poor, not homophobic, thank you very much.
-I eat (not on) Top Ramen.
It really just makes sense to have a Cuba Gooding Junior High.
-I’ll build it, just show me the money.
“Two steps forward. Two steps back” – Police officer to Paula Abdul during a field sobriety test
-What if the police officer is just the dancing cat?
Mourn the end of “Breaking Bad,” but rejoice at the end of media coverage about the cast’s on- and off-screen chemistry.
Can’t believe Walter White was a tranny!
Russian people are lucky because they always sound drunk.
-That’s a slur.
this boltbus driver is having a better set than i had last night
-His callback of “Go Greyhound” is killing it.
I like to think that the song “Send in the Clowns” is about a hostage situation where the police have completely run out of ideas.
-And you can pack them all into one SWAT van!
*writes painfully detailed and uncomfortable explanation for inability to attend Facebook event on the event’s wall*
-Sent from my T.M. iPhone.
And my best:
How do you explain this hot penne on penne action, Mr. Barilla?
See y’all next week!