In honor of Labor Day, LYGO’s team of Tweeters took their best shots. Then, I (toosoon_huh) add commentary. We’re doing better than Lamar Odom.
We all see signs that say “Towed at owners expense.” Are there signs that say that you will get towed, but it’s on them?
-Canada, maybe? “We booted your car, but it’s a nice boot, eh?”
-Shockingly, she seems illiterate. After all, “butter” isn’t a letter.
Finally realized my goal of trying and failing to make a guy laugh while he’s eating nachos with his back to me.
– You’re a chip off the Velveeta block, David.
My life coach keeps benching me 🙁
– I’ve never been good at the game of Life. I usually had a car full of kids and never was ready for the Day of Reckoning.
The guy sitting next to me on the bus is watching a documentary about Jeffrey Dahmer AND just told me that my handwriting is creepy.
-You telling him to “Eat me” was a poor choice of words.
Most, if not all, of today’s problems would be resolved if John Candy were still around.
-Candy for President, Farley for V.P.
Character actors aka ugly people with talent.
-Somewhere, Steve Buscemi is weeping.
I wish Angelina Jolie were married to a cup of flan so that we could call them Flangelina.
– You’re such a tart, M.K.. I may “adopt” this expression.
Teen Week on Jeopardy. Perfect on a low self esteem day.
-“What is a woman naked, Alex? No, really, I’ll never see one.”- Teen contestant on Jeopardy
Syria plan: Instead of missile attack, we hijack their radio/tv/internet channels and play Nickelback on repeat. Easiest. War. Ever.
See y’all next week. -JWY