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Facebuzzed Vol. 27 – Three Olives Vodka

Facebuzzed Vol. 27 – Three Olives Vodka

This week on Facebuzzed we visit Three Olives Vodka, which has taken to using quotes from famous people to promote their liquor. And apparently no one was off limits:

three olives- mlk

I don’t feel super comfortable about seeing Dr. King’s words that close to a product whose marketers literally thought “You know what I want my vodka to taste like? A child’s cereal.”  I’m pretty sure it wasn’t “Letter from Birmingham Jail…because I publicly urinated in an Applebees parking lot after happy hour.”

Thankfully, they didn’t do something stupid like make Dr. King the posthumous spokesman for Three Olives. Nah they went with someone living and settled on the smoldering looks of U.K. actor Clive Owen:

Cabbie: Um sir...you can't have open containers back ther--oh shit are you Clive Owen? Yeah? WELL COVER YOUR SHIT UP

Cabbie: Um sir…you can’t have open containers back ther–oh shit are you Clive Owen? Yeah? WELL COVER YOUR SHIT UP

Could we at least photoshop a woman into this photo who looks like she’s consenting to his company? I wouldn’t take the drink if I was her. And it was clear they didn’t care about making him look less rapey with the next one:

three olives - clive weak drinks

And strong yet odorless hallucinogenic drugs…

But Three Olives gave you your own instructions on how to enjoy their cocktails when Clive isn’t around:

three olives - cocktail chart

I came to a screeching halt at #3. Did they mean “become”? Because odds are you weren’t extremely good looking when you began the vodka consumption:

This seems a bit more accurate.

This seems a bit more accurate.

 

 

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