Facebuzzed Vol. 14 – Fireball Whisky

Facebuzzed Vol. 14 – Fireball Whisky

This week on Facebuzzed we visit Fireball Whisky. Fireball starts out by reminding us of its versatility. That cinnamon flavor is not just meant to be swilled at your favorite dive bar:

Familarize yourself with the burning sensation of cinnamon whisky as your pastor delivers a sermon about the hell you're totally headed for...because you brought liquor into a church.

Let the burning sensation of cinnamon whiskey prepare you for the hell your pastor has been preaching about for the past half-hour.

The marketing team at Fireball is pretty full of itself and self-assured of their product’s rank among other alcoholic beverages.

fireball - don't feel like fireball

Really Fireball? No one ever? We can’t respect someone’s right to NOT guzzle before a Friday night?

fireball - don't feel like fireball2

Also one Guinness is rather filling.

During the holiday season Fireball touted itself as the perfect complement to Internet shopping:

fireball - cybermonday

I can understand drinking whiskey if you actually had to leave your house to go Black Friday shopping. Even I would need something to numb the pain from dealing with the shopping horde. But inside by yourself? You’re bound to ensure everyone you shop for gets a shitty gift:

Screen shot 2013-04-23 at 11.31.45 PM

The next time you write “2nd trimester E.T. fetus” next to my name on your Christmas gift list I’m cutting you off at the bar.

Finally, Fireball decided the best way to sell its wares is in the very vehicle it shares part of its name with. Though I feel bad for anyone trying to flag this down in a real emergency:

fireball - fire truck