These tweets are brought to you by Scope Mouthwash–Now with minty fresh bacon! Some of the best in DC Comedy, LYGO Alum TWITs:
“Yes, indubitably.” (Grabs hold of his suspenders)
These corporate suits know nothing. Combo-appliances are IN. The toilet/toaster would be a HUGE success. It would sell like toilet/hotcakes.
Easter aka 2 for $3 Filet O Fish is over 🙁
Did a bit last night about a repentant jihadist that I’m happy to say, did not bomb.
At least one woman has allowed Antonin Scalia to have sex with her before. Think about that.
good try frozen yogurt store that plays rap. that’s like putting rims on a pony.
Homosexuality isn’t a choice. You’re born that way. It’s in their skinny genes.
Reddit is the Jacob’s Ladder of social networking
Marriage is one of those things people do for the wrong reasons. Like getting non-prescription glasses or watching Battleship the Movie.
America likes its gay marriage the same way it likes its teens: barely legal.